One of the best ways to maintain a pure life is to watch out for the
purity of others. What can you do to protect your brothers and sisters
in the Lord from impurity? What can you say to encourage them to keep
their hearts set in the direction of righteousness? The support and
protection you can provide to same-sex friends is important, but the
protection you can give to opposite sex friends is invaluable. When it
comes to purity in relationships --both physical and emotional-girls and
guys usually trip each other up. Can you imagine the righteousness that
could be born if both sexes took it upon themselves to watch out for
each other? Let's look at specific ways this can be accomplished
THE GUY'S RESPONSIBILITY
Guys, it's time we stood up to defend the honor and righteousness of our sisters. We need to stop acting like "hunters" trying to catch girls and begin seeing ourselves as warriors standing guard over them. How do we do this? First we must realize that girls don't struggle with the same temptations we struggle with. We wrestle more with our sex drives while girls struggle more with their emotions. We can help guard their hearts by being sincere and honest in our communication. We need to swear off flirtatiousness and refuse to play games and lead them on. We have to go out of our way to make sure nothing we say or do stirs up inappropriate feelings or expectations. A good friend, John, modeled this idea of guarding a girl's purity in his relationship with Ruth, the woman to whom he's now married. Long before they began pursuing marriage, both felt deeply attracted to the other. But during a certain season, God made it clear to Ruth that she had to focus on Him and not be distracted by John. Although John didn't know this at the time, he made it his priority to guard Ruth's heart during this time of waiting, even though he felt personally drawn to her. John controlled his desire to flirt with Ruth. He passed up opportunities to spend time alone with her, and when they were in group settings he refrained from singling her out and focusing too much attention on her. He avoided doing anything that would make it harder for Julie to focus on serving God. This season didn't last forever, and eventually John and Ruth became engaged. A few weeks before their wedding. Ruth explained how grateful she felt that John had enough maturity to put her needs above his own. By making her emotional and spiritual purity a priority, John helped Ruth focus her mind and heart on God. If John had acted selfishly, he could have distracted Ruth and ruined what God wanted to accomplish in and through her life. What an example of brotherly love! I want to weep when I think of the many times I have neglected my responsibility to guard girls' hearts. Instead of playing the role of a warrior, I played the thief, stealing their focus from God for myself. I'm determined to do better. I want to be the kind of friend to whom girls' future husbands could one day say, "Thank you for standing watch over my wife's heart. Thank you for guarding her purity."
THE GIRL'S RESPONSIBILITY
Girls, you have an equally important role. Remember the wayward woman we discussed earlier? Your job is to keep your brothers from being led astray by her charms. Please be aware of how easily your actions and glances can stir up lust in a guy's mind. You may not realize this, but we guys most commonly struggle with our eyes. I think many girls are innocently unaware of the difficulty a guy has in remaining pure when looking at a girl who is dressed immodestly. Now I don't want to dictate your wardrobe, but honestly speaking, I would be blessed if girls considered more than fashion when shopping for clothes. Yes, guys are responsible for maintaining self-control, but you can help by refusing to wear clothing designed to attract attention to your body. I know the world tells you that if you have a nice body, you should show it off. And we men have only helped feed this mentality. But I think you can play a part in reversing this trend. I know many girls who would look great in shorter skirts or tighter blouses, and they know it. But they choose to dress modestly. They take the responsibility of guarding their brothers' eyes. To these women and others like them, I'm grateful. "And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds" (Hebrews 10:24). It's time to start seeing other people's purity as our responsibility
THE GUY'S RESPONSIBILITY
Guys, it's time we stood up to defend the honor and righteousness of our sisters. We need to stop acting like "hunters" trying to catch girls and begin seeing ourselves as warriors standing guard over them. How do we do this? First we must realize that girls don't struggle with the same temptations we struggle with. We wrestle more with our sex drives while girls struggle more with their emotions. We can help guard their hearts by being sincere and honest in our communication. We need to swear off flirtatiousness and refuse to play games and lead them on. We have to go out of our way to make sure nothing we say or do stirs up inappropriate feelings or expectations. A good friend, John, modeled this idea of guarding a girl's purity in his relationship with Ruth, the woman to whom he's now married. Long before they began pursuing marriage, both felt deeply attracted to the other. But during a certain season, God made it clear to Ruth that she had to focus on Him and not be distracted by John. Although John didn't know this at the time, he made it his priority to guard Ruth's heart during this time of waiting, even though he felt personally drawn to her. John controlled his desire to flirt with Ruth. He passed up opportunities to spend time alone with her, and when they were in group settings he refrained from singling her out and focusing too much attention on her. He avoided doing anything that would make it harder for Julie to focus on serving God. This season didn't last forever, and eventually John and Ruth became engaged. A few weeks before their wedding. Ruth explained how grateful she felt that John had enough maturity to put her needs above his own. By making her emotional and spiritual purity a priority, John helped Ruth focus her mind and heart on God. If John had acted selfishly, he could have distracted Ruth and ruined what God wanted to accomplish in and through her life. What an example of brotherly love! I want to weep when I think of the many times I have neglected my responsibility to guard girls' hearts. Instead of playing the role of a warrior, I played the thief, stealing their focus from God for myself. I'm determined to do better. I want to be the kind of friend to whom girls' future husbands could one day say, "Thank you for standing watch over my wife's heart. Thank you for guarding her purity."
THE GIRL'S RESPONSIBILITY
Girls, you have an equally important role. Remember the wayward woman we discussed earlier? Your job is to keep your brothers from being led astray by her charms. Please be aware of how easily your actions and glances can stir up lust in a guy's mind. You may not realize this, but we guys most commonly struggle with our eyes. I think many girls are innocently unaware of the difficulty a guy has in remaining pure when looking at a girl who is dressed immodestly. Now I don't want to dictate your wardrobe, but honestly speaking, I would be blessed if girls considered more than fashion when shopping for clothes. Yes, guys are responsible for maintaining self-control, but you can help by refusing to wear clothing designed to attract attention to your body. I know the world tells you that if you have a nice body, you should show it off. And we men have only helped feed this mentality. But I think you can play a part in reversing this trend. I know many girls who would look great in shorter skirts or tighter blouses, and they know it. But they choose to dress modestly. They take the responsibility of guarding their brothers' eyes. To these women and others like them, I'm grateful. "And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds" (Hebrews 10:24). It's time to start seeing other people's purity as our responsibility
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